Coming Out of the (Consciousness) Closet! What to do when you’re the only one awake!

When everyone you know and love is asleep and you’re the only one awake, the world can sure seem lonely and even unfriendly at times.

While the concept of awakening can have many definitions, in a nutshell, awakening can be summarized as the rising of consciousness, and this means that regardless of path or process, the more conscious we become, the more we awaken.

Although the process of awakening can be a wonderful thing, it can also be quite challenging. In fact, if you’re one of the first in your family or community to awaken, “coming out” as a conscious being can be one of the most difficult things you ever do! Not surprisingly, many conscious people choose to hide, in what I call, the “Consciousness Closet.”

In fact, there are three very good reasons that conscious people hide in the Consciousness Closet!

Reason #1 – Avoid Judgment!
More than likely, if we’re the only one who is conscious in our family or community and everyone we know thinks we’re crazy, rather than subjecting ourselves to judgment and rejection, it might seem easier to suppress our conscious thoughts and ideas, and simply hide in the Consciousness Closet.

Reason #2 – Loss of Connection!
Maybe we’re not afraid of being judged and alienated by our sleepy friends or family, but rather, we no longer have any interest in discussing the same old mundane or materialistic topics with unconscious people.

Reason #3 - Relating to Sleepy Folks is Depleting!
While our sleepy friends and family are still trying to relate to us from an unconscious wave length (because that is all they know), if we mirror their energy, we can easily slip back into unconsciousness, and since this can be very depleting, we might choose to hide in the Consciousness Closet where we can avoid these relationships and protect our energy.

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Whether we hide in the Consciousness Closet in order to avoid negative reactions from unconscious people or because we don’t want to feel bored or depleted, sooner or later, we have to ask ourselves, how conscious can we really be while suppressing our True Selves?

Furthermore, if the majority of conscious people choose to hide in the Consciousness Closet, how can global consciousness evolve?

Consciousness Cannot Evolve in the Closet!

While many conscious people feel that they’re here to make a difference in the world, this cannot happen while suppressing consciousness and hiding in the closet! Additionally, we might want to consider that as one of the first to awaken, it’s quite possible that we have an unspoken responsibility to help our families and communities wake-up.

Therefore, rather than suppressing our expanded consciousness around those less conscious, maybe it’s time to openly share our views, experiences and knowledge, and when appropriate, maybe even provide some guidance. Although many people are not yet willing to wake-up, you might actually be surprised by who is!

Before we continue, however, let’s be clear that regardless of whether a person is awake or asleep, it has absolutely no bearing on his or her worth, and this means that no one is any better or worse than anyone else. Since everyone is inevitably waking up, one’s level of consciousness simply indicates their current “location” on the journey of awakening.

Come Out of the Closet and Be Conscious!

So, if you’re ready to come out of the Consciousness Closet and help others awaken, it’s important to participate in conscious communication and connection.
Therefore, you must know two important things:

• How to consciously communicate and connect with less conscious people.

• How to maintain a high level of consciousness without being pulled down.

#1 - Consciously Connect and Communicate

As the more conscious person in a relationship, if you want to connect, it’s your job to cultivate the connection. Now, I’ll be the first to admit that engaging in a conversation with an unconscious person can feel like nails scratching on a chalk board. However, it only feels this way because we are perceiving the person through our own judgment, and, therefore, if we want to communicate with someone less conscious, it’s necessary to drop all judgments.

Moreover, keeping in mind that every time we push, preach or project our views about life or spirituality, we’re actually asking others to question the beliefs that have shaped their entire lives.

No matter how well-meaning you might be, if you challenge or contradict a person’s beliefs, they’ll likely feel threatened and close down, and if they feel judged, they’ll probably become defensive and judge in return. Consequently, they’ll miss or dismiss your new ideas or even treat you like you have the plague.

Therefore, if you want to help someone awaken, it’s up to you to create a non-judgmental space where it’s safe for them to explore new ideas. Furthermore, since it’s impossible to connect with anyone you’re looking down upon, it’s important to meet people exactly where they are, and this means “speaking their language” and not expecting them to speak yours.

Maybe you’re thinking, “Why do I have to be the one making all the effort?”

Well, you are the only one who can! You see, while people with lower consciousness cannot move into higher consciousness until they experience a significant shift, those with higher consciousness have a greater capacity to relate to everyone.

Some Good Communication Rules to Follow!

Since it’s usually best to approach new ideas when a person is more open and receptive, don’t launch into a potentially controversial subject when someone is having a bad day. Instead, patiently wait for the right opportunity – and when you do share, follow these simple rules:

• Don’t get into a debate.
• Don’t judge anyone’s beliefs.
• Don’t act like you know better.
• Don’t be attached to the outcome.
• Don’t share with people who are clearly not interested.
• Don’t try to convince someone that their lives will improve if they mirror yours.

In a nutshell, if you push, preach or project your views or beliefs, you’ll only seem self-righteous and you’ll likely be met with protest. And, remember, if you don’t want people to judge you, don’t judge them!

Consider that when the time is right, you might want to share a book or article on a particular topic or you might even introduce a new concept through a third party approach. For instance, you might say something like, “My friend “so and so” told me about an amazing experience she had at a meditation group.” Or, “I just read this book about some interesting new ideas.” And, then, if your words are received with an inquisitive response, do your best to share more information in a relaxed and inviting manner - without expecting a specific response or outcome.

Introducing someone to more conscious concepts is often a process that takes time, but, if you’re patient and non-judgmental, and you wait for the right opportunities, the “long game” has been known to pay off in surprising ways.

#2 – Maintain Your Consciousness

As consciousness rises and we awaken, our vibration naturally rises accordingly. However, until we’re anchored in a higher state of consciousness, vibration can easily fluctuate. Therefore, when you relate to less conscious people, be careful not to compromise your vibration by lowering your consciousness to meet theirs.

So, rather than allowing your high vibration to be influenced by someone’s lower vibration, you must be responsible for your own energy, and this means that it’s important to avoid 3 major pitfalls:

• Don’t Get Enrolled

Unconscious people often want to enroll us in their reality, and once we believe their stories of victimhood or scarcity, our high vibe entrains with their low vibe - and we end up feeling very, very bad.

• Say “No” to Sympathy

We might also lower our vibration and take on someone’s energy if we feel sorry for them or judge their experience.

• Don’t Assume Responsibility

Additionally, if we believe that it’s our job to change someone’s negative circumstances or if we believe that we are responsible for making them feel better, we automatically take on their energy and align with their vibration.


Overall, in order to maintain a high vibration while interacting with less conscious people, avoid getting enrolled in anyone’s story, replace judgment and sympathy with compassion, and never take responsibility for another person’s experience.

In a nutshell, the more you cultivate and maintain a high vibration, the less likely your vibration will be “pulled down” and the more likely others can “tune up” to your vibration, thereby helping them awaken.

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Even though it can be quite challenging to communicate with less conscious people, keep in mind that the more conscious person in any relationship is responsible for the tone of the relationship. Therefore, blaming an unconscious person for making you feel bad is not only useless, it’s also disempowering for both of you, and, consequently, there’s no way to improve the dynamics of the relationship.

You just never know whose waking-up!

So, you know all those people you thought would never wake-up? Well, they’re waking up too and they may be hiding in the closet just like you! For instance, a dear friend once told me that I was the only one he could really talk to because all his other friends were still asleep. Well, one day, I met one of his friends privately, and after spending the better part of a day walking on Venice Beach and talking openly, he confided that I was the only person he could really talk to because everyone he knew was still asleep.

“How interesting!” I thought. Now, here were two good friends, both feeling alone and alienated, and yet, they were too afraid to speak openly with one another. But, of course, this isn’t an isolated situation. Since then, I have witnessed the same dynamic many times over. Needless to say, the moral of the story is that you just never know who might be awakening.

So, maybe you too know people who are secretly awakening, and maybe like you, they’re also hiding in the Consciousness Closet, and if so, this could mean that some of the people you’re hiding from might also be hiding from you.

The EYE Rollers

Over the years, I’ve discovered that when people outwardly protest new ideas or quietly show signs of non-verbal judgment, such as rolling their eyes, they’re actually listening to what’s being said. In fact, when people negatively react to new ideas, those ideas are often recorded in their subconscious minds for later playback, and this means that when the time is right, they’ll remember what you said.

Since we can never know what seeps into someone’s consciousness, I say let the “eye rollers” roll their eyes and let the “naysayers” say their nays!
But, remember, most of all, even if someone rejects your ideas, it doesn’t mean that they are rejecting you – so don’t take anything personally! Believe it or not, it’s none of your business what anyone thinks about you any way!

So, if you want to “be the change you want to see in the world,” the first step is coming out of closet and sharing your consciousness!

With grace & gratitude,
Nanice